Wednesday, September 19, 2018

Are You Trying To Prove Yourself?

Welcome back! 
Today I want to talk about something that I am currently working through that I didn't realize was an issue for me.

I noticed that after I would interact with a specific group of people I would rehearse the interaction in my mind asking myself things like "was that weird or did they...did you notice how...I wonder why they said..." and the list goes on. Am I the only person that does this!? Lol please say no!

Lol after examining myself and peeling back the layers on why I do this, I uncovered that I feel a need to prove myself to them. Before we go any further let me be clear. I am not insecure, shy or timid. If you spoke to anyone that I interact with on a regular basis they would tell you I am fearless and comfortable in my own skin. I love being transparent, sharing my weaknesses, and talking about things I've experienced in an effort to help you jump over some of the mistakes I've made in my goal-crushing adventure.

So, when I understood that I had a desire to prove myself I started to dig a little deeper to honestly figure out why. Sometimes as goal-getters we're so busy making an impact, building our lives, and creating new opportunities that we don't always catch the small seeds of fear, discouragement, or pride taking root in our hearts. For me, it's important to deal with these things before they turn into fully grown tree's as they affect your character and overall quality of life whether you're aware of it or not.

Two years from now I don't want to be the girl striving for "success" to prove to others that I am worthy, capable, or they missed out on something good. I am already all of these things whether anyone else believes, agrees or approves and in all honesty, most times people won't see your value because they struggle to see their own. Even if you appeared in the form of a clear glass filled with gold they would find a way to dismiss your value and belittle your treasure so stop wasting your time. Be yourself, crush your goals one step at a time, and live the life of your dreams, not theirs.

So, now let me ask you. Do you struggle with trying to prove your value to others? Do you sometimes feel underestimated or overlooked? Well, now you know you're definitely not alone. Your reason might be different from mine, but the behavior looks the same. Let's make a pack to nip this in the butt and not give in to people's expectation of us, not allow fear to control our lives, and not conform to external pressure. Deal?

Until next time,

Theresa Forever

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

The Trouble Is You Think You Have Time

What would you do if you went to the doctor today and they told you, you only have 12 months to live? What would you think about at that moment? Who would you call? I know, it's pretty hard to imagine, but just take a moment to think about it.

"You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away."
- James

How would your life change after this moment? Would you reconcile with old friends that hurt you in the past or maybe finally accept the people in your family that others consider outcast? Who do you think would be affected by your death? Probably not your employer, right? Your answers to these questions reveal who you impact the most and where you should spend more of your time right now.

Related Post: Invest In Yourself

When I consider this hypothetical scenario I imagine that I would spend less time planning and thinking about things I'd like to see, try, and accomplish and I'd just go out there and do it. I would create more memories with my kids and take plenty of road trips with people that I love. I would go mountain climbing, bungee jumping, skydiving and zip lining at least once a month for the rest of my life. I would also travel to a third world country, find a village and spend time with all the orphans. My goal would be to help them establish a safe community where they can sustain themselves and have clean drinking water.

Related Post: A Man With Money Is No Match Against A Man On A Mission

You see this topic is all too familiar to me. Over the years I've lost a lot of people including my mom to illness, a loving mentor to cancer, friends to suicide and violence, and the list goes on. I know first hand that our next breathe isn't guaranteed. Something could happen today that changes what we're capable of doing tomorrow. This is why I trust God in every season of life and I try to live fearlessly without regrets.

"The trouble is you think you have time."
- Budda

Now that you've been reminded of the finite time you have left, what will you do with it? How will you maximize it? I want you to get clear on exactly who you want to be and what you want to do. Think about some of the dreams you had as a kid. These can be used as clues of what our mission in life is. Did you enjoy science or biology? Maybe you're supposed to help us find a cure for cancer. Did you always feel that we should do more than just give a homeless person change? Well, maybe that's your cue to help them become stable and get off the street. What about seeing less fortunate kids on t.v, did that make you want to adopt them? If so, maybe you should open an orphanage to care for infants and youth. The dreams and possibilities are endless! I could go on and on forever.

The bottom line is, find your mission and get out there and start living it. None of us have as much time as we think, but we can start right now with what we have. Get clear on the outcome you want to produce, map out a plan and crush it. No excuses, just results. If one route leads to a dead end, find another way. Life is too short not to live it on a mission. None of us will live forever so let's enjoy the journey, find someone to bless and make our time on earth count. Until next time, xoxo!

Theresa Forever

Monday, September 10, 2018

A Man With Money Is No Match Against A Man On A Mission

"Outstanding people have one thing in common: an absolute sense of mission."- Zig Ziglar

Welcome back! If you're new here welcome to the Tee Forever Lifestyle Blog For Goal-Getters. It's a very chilly and rainy morning here in the city of Toronto (my 2 years old daughter LOVES rainy days by the way haha). I'm hoping for a peak of sunshine later in the day. I guess we'll see what happens! :) For everyone that signed up for the 5-day How Badly Do You Want It Challenge today is Day 1! Woooouuu hooouu! You will receive an email later today filled with golden nuggets on the art of achieving your goal(s) and I'll post my first short video in our group explaining the challenge in detail. If you haven't signed up but would like to be a part of the challenge just run over to our exclusive Goal-Getters group and sign up!

"Surround yourself with those who have the same mission as you." - Unknown

Can I ask you a question? Do you know what your absolute mission in life is? Can you describe it in detail? Who benefits from your mission? What happens if you don't achieve it? Who will be affected?

As I thought about these questions and sought answers for myself the grey areas and confusion about what I was supposed to do slowly began to fade. I noticed that my mission wasn't related to something that I had to attain. It wasn't about getting recognition, building wealth, or making the right connections. It was about serving humanity starting with the people closest to me in my community and developing my personal maturity.

The mission of your life will not have a dollar amount attached to it because money is a resource that's meant to aid you in your journey not determine your path. Know what I mean? Having money can play a role in achieving your mission, but it is not the mission in and of itself. Money and external resources work with your mission, they are not the mission.

"A man with money is no match against a man on a mission." - Doyle Brunson

Personal development is a key component to reach your mission because you have to evolve in order to be responsible enough to handle the mission and everything that comes with it. You have to think more critically, listen more intentionally, put your knowledge into practice and really learn how to love people. For example, we start off in this world as babies. We can't walk, talk, or help ourselves. We can't even hold our head up because our neck isn't strong enough to support it. After a few months with much practice and baby exercises, we're able to do more, become independent and think for ourselves. Now if a baby doesn't go through these stages a doctor will become concerned and advise the parents to seek treatment or engage in alternative methods because the child's experience is abnormal.

Well, the same is true in our adult life. If we are only living to pay bills and survive then we have stunted our growth and have become distracted from our mission. You were not created to go to school, graduate and work a well paid 9-5 job that provides benefits. You were made to do something for your family, change the injustice in your community and heal your neighbors with love and compassion. You were made to add value to the world.

So now tell me, what do you think your mission in life is? What is the one thing you know you must do to add value to your friends, family, community, nation, and maybe even the world? What were you designed to create? How can that help our society? How will your life make a difference in the lives of people that know you? What are you here to do?

I strongly believe that your mission is connected to your purpose and knowing your mission will set you free to be unapologetically yourself. You don't have to compromise and live a "normal" life like everyone around you. You can live with passion, purpose, and excitement because you have a mission. Until next time, xoxo!

Theresa Forever

Wednesday, September 5, 2018

How Badly Do You Want It?

What is the point of having goals if you can't achieve them, right? Well, that's why this month WE ARE GOING TO CRUSH THEM!

Last month (in August), you got a little break. We didn't do any group challenges, I let you off the hook, but now that you're revitalized and full of fresh vision I know that you're hungry to start creating change and to further your growth so if you're ready to move forward scream "I!" (Y'all know I'm jumping off the ceiling right now, I'm so excited).

In this season of the blog, we're doing things a little differently. Usually, we host monthly challenges spread across 30 days. This was fun, it gave us something to work towards as a community, and we were all inspired by each others progress. However, not everyone could commit to a 30-day challenge and my goal is to help as many people as I can to do what seems or feels impossible so, during this season I'll be hosting shorter challenges that yield faster results if you commit to the process and put in the work.

How This Work?

1. I will post the full 5-day challenge on my blog next Monday at 11am.

2. After you download a copy of the instructions get started on the work for the day (day 1, day 2, day 3, etc).

3. Sign up for daily reminders and check-ins to help you stay focused and committed to your goal(s).

4. Join the exclusive goal-getters community for accountability and mindset videos. You will also find people like you who are busy parents, entrepreneurs, and goal-getters sharing their wins, struggles, and progress.

What Is Your Goal?

I want you to think about the goal you've always dreamed about accomplishing, but right now is hiding under all of your daily responsibilities and social media distractions. It's in the back corner of your mind. You know, the corner where all of your future aspirations go, right beside the things you tell yourself you'd like to do SOMEDAY. Yes, THAT goal!

You've had this goal ever since you were a child, but you let go because someone told you, you could never achieve it. You gave up on it after you had tried and failed for what feels like 100 times. People even laughed at when you shared it in a moment of vulnerability.

During this challenge, I will walk you through the exact steps you need to take to get started and begin making progress on THIS goals.

No more falling off the wagon halfway through your progress, no more giving up on what you know is possible, and no more beating yourself up for not completing personal promises you make to yourself. 5 days is just enough time for you to really dial in and focus all of your energy on hitting one clear goal.

First things first join the exclusive group for Goal-Getters and share a book that you would recommend to a fellow high achiever. I'll see you on Monday at 11am for day 1 of our challenge! Xoxo!

Theresa Forever

Thursday, August 30, 2018

Failure Is A Gift From God (3 things failure produces in you)

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: 
it is the courage to continue that counts."
- Winston Churchill

Raise your hand if you've ever dropped the ball and messed up something that was important to you! You already know that I'm with you! Lol, I've done it many times and in most cases, I've been able to glean valuable lessons from the experience. Although having failure as a teacher can be embarrassing, it's an opportunity for you to graduate and evolve so that you're better prepared for your next season in life.

Over the last few months, I've walked through some exciting life changes and made some huge leaps of faith (I'll share all the details in another post). Did I enjoy the entire ride? *Smh* Nope! Would I change anything about it? Yes!

My initial response was optimism with a strong belief that I am ready! After hearing some comments from a few people around me I got distracted and began to feel discouraged. I knew that what I was experiencing was an incredible blessing and an invitation to fully live life on purpose, but my attitude changed. I began to focus on what was going on around me instead of what was happening FOR me. Did you catch that? There is a huge difference.

When I focused on what was going on around me and how I thought others perceived me I got distracted. I lost my vision and adapted others limited perspective. This only led to me feeling discouraged. However, when I re-evaluated my focus and examined why I felt this way, especially when I strongly believed it was a life-changing opportunity I had to let go of what others thought and follow the path that I worked hard to create and that I knew God laid out for me.

"Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, 
this time more intelligently."
 - Henry Ford

This eye-opening experience has been better than any personal development book I've read. Some days I would dance out of bed ready to crush every minute and kill 5 major projects in a day (I think I'm superwoman when I'm on cloud 10). Other days I would roll out of bed with a smile on my face and a bruised heart, looking for something to remind me of my purpose. All in all I've learned so many valuable lessons, but here are 3 key takeaways. You ready? Let's go!

1. Long-Term Vision

Failure might make you feel like you've hit a wall or a really high mountain that might kill you if you try to climb it, but here's the truth. It's examination time!

  • What - What are you doing here? What valuable lesson can you learn from this experience? Do you want to continue in this direction? What do you want to be true about your life 1 year from today? What do you need to adjust in your life to get to where you want to be?

  • Where - Check-in with yourself. Where are you right now (emotionally and mentally)?  Process your current thoughts and feelings and then create a plan to get to where you want to be by next month. Do you want to be excited about life again? Do you want to be less stressed and feel more fulfilled? Do you want to be around people that challenge you? What do you want to feel every day? 

  • Why - Why are you here (examine the role you played in why you failed)? Don't overthink or over analyze this step. Just write the first ideas that come to mind. Do you want to continue in this direction or change directions? Why or why not?

  • When - When will you put your new plans into action?  How much time will it take for you to start seeing results?  Get specific, create a timeline.

  • Who - Who do you want to be 1 year from today? What do you need to do to become that person? Is there anyone you can work with to help you navigate through this change? Are there any mentors or coaches you want to work with?

  • How - How did you end up here? How will you adjust your direction to align with where you want to end up next year? Do you need to develop your skills? Is there someone you can train with? 

These powerful questions will help you to sober up and take charge of your next season. You are responsible for the outcome of your life. If you don't like where you're headed change directions. If you want to continue but feel you've hit a roadblock, get creative and figure out how to proceed. You may have to create a new lane.

2. Self-Awareness 

Failure reveals your hidden capabilities. You're unaware of what you don't know about yourself until you're faced with a challenge. Here's an example you may not know that you're a creative writer until you've hit a dead end, start journaling to release your thoughts and then suddenly realize that you enjoy it and you have a gift for writing. You could start painting and then begin to notice over time that most of your work has a clean finish and you have an eye for design and putting colors together. It's unbelievable what you will discover about yourself when you have to figure out creative solutions to problems you're facing.

"Challenges make you wiser, stronger, and more capable. Don't quit."
- Tee Forever

3. New goals

As you evaluate your overall life vision and discover new interest you will begin to set new concise goals and this my friend is where life begins! You were made for more than the common, every day, ordinary endeavors. Your life was meant to be lived on purpose. Sometimes you're on the right path and failure comes to strengthen your skills, knowledge, and so on. Like a fire under your butt forcing you to push yourself. Other times you might be falling asleep, headed in the wrong directions and failure comes to wake you up and say "Hey! You're going in the wrong direction!" either way, failure is a gift from God. When you fail, set new goals.

Failure is always an invitation to something greater. Always. It's a tool to build you up, to bring out the best in you and to challenge you to think more critically. Lol, if we're honest, most of us don't want to fail because it doesn't feel like a promotion, but always remember this secret. If you stay the course, fight for your goals, and push yourself to achieve new heights, failure will become your best friend. It's a tool you will always have in your box of life resources. Until next time, xoxo!

Theresa Forever
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